sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
