So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Randomize