@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I'm both gender and math confused
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
i out mim tonsoeep
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