Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
