I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
4 words: hood of his car
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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