Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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