we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
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