Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
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