just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
