she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
whose ass print is on the piano?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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