He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
