shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize