I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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