he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm way too hungover for life right now
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
