Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
