i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
organizing the empties. That sober.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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