I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
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I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
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Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain