if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
My vagina is officially offended.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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