i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
