Three words: puerto rican gang bang
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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