we should wear snuggies to the strip club
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize