my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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