So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
