I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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