even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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