Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize