He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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