i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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