Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
