But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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