I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize