Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
