I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
