Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Randomize
