i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
