Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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