he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize