I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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