I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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