What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
i drank out of a bidet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize