So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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