Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
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