All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize