Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
He has the fingertips of a God
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