Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
