yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
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Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
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Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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