i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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