Joe is yelling at the trees again.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
