if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
