I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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