Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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